This week on “hold off, Is it a romantic date?” we’re joined by Autostraddle Chief Executive Officer and
L Keyword
specialist
Riese Bernard
to go over: The Chart. That’s right! This episode is all about lesbian interconnectivity â hooking up with buddies’ exes, friends starting up with our exes, while the tradition developed by all those things crisis.
Appear when it comes down to gossip, remain for your psychological running. And before that enjoy a-game that examinations Christina’s boundaries: Would U-Haul? (Spoiler alert: she usually wouldn’t normally.)
Thanks a lot for all your great feedback after our very own premiere! When you haven’t however start thinking about giving us a rating or evaluate!
Site there: http://www.michigangaychat.com/local-gay-hookup.html
PROGRAM RECORDS
+ Five years ago Riese make an
Old Hollywood information
that is the intersection of my interests.
+ Here’s
the article
I reference where I mention connecting using my roommates.
+ My crush of week Mj Rodriguez released a music movie for her track
“one thing to state”
!
+ As somebody who has only viewed a few periods of
The Nanny
this montage
of Christina’s crush associated with few days C.C. Babcock was actually shocking in my opinion whenever it proved she and Niles aren’t both homosexual. (Christina informs me they essentially however are.)
Drew:
I would end up being extremely okay with it existing. I would personally never ever include somebody else without their unique permission. Although notion of whenever some one was like, “make sure you might be linked to me,” I would be like, “Yeah, it’s the life I lived. I really don’t mind.” Is the fact that strange? Would be that problematic?
Christina:
No, as if I becamen’t, i’d feel terrible not. I’d wind up as, “hold off, I am not lying?”
Theme track performs
Drew:
Hi, I Am Drew.
Christina:
Hi, I Am Christina.
Drew:
And thank you for visiting
Wait, Is It A Date?
Christina:
Hold Off, Is It A Romantic Date?
is an Autostraddle podcast asking the big questions. First, can it be a date? What exactly are dates? That times? Can we like times? These represent the variety of questions that people address with this right here extremely specialist and lovely podcast.
Drew:
I’m called Drew Gregory. I’m a writer at Autostraddle and a filmmaker and, famously, a trans lesbian.
Christina:
My name is Christina Tucker. I’m also an author at Autostraddle. I am a loud queer on the internet. Im getting better at explaining myself as a writer and, famously, a lesbian. Which is all of us. That is which our company is.
Drew:
Yeah. And so our very own primary subject this week may be the Chart.
Christina:
I just thought it required a sting. I don’t know. That thought actually dramatic, but i do believe it required it.
Drew:
Yes. No, please, please, kindly. Many thanks, thank-you. No, no, no. The most suitable level of drama.
Christina:
Thank you so much.
Drew:
Yeah. So we’re referring to lesbian interconnectivity.
Christina:
I enjoy that term because it seems like you need to restart the lesbians. It sounds just like the connection to the internet is not functioning.
Drew:
Yes. It’s very advanced level, very advanced, but has existed since there’s been lesbians, In my opinion.
Christina:
Yeah. I think scholars will say as soon as they found one lesbian fossils, they found an information alongside ones created to the mud. And I also think that’s just what that movie is about, right? It’s about the information? That motion picture with Kate Winslet and the sand fossils?
Drew:
Ammonite?
Christina:
Yeah, that is what it is more about.
Drew:
If only
Ammonite
was about cave females. I’d watch that lesbian flick.
Christina:
Really, as I have not seen it, I’m going to bravely declare that it was. Cool.
Drew:
Yeah. Because it’s like we’ve got many lesbian duration parts, but we’ve never gone back that much. And that I think it’s time we perform.
Christina:
Let’s simply keep having it furthermore back in time.
Drew:
Before we get to our main subject, you’re nevertheless learning all of us. And that I believed it would be enjoyable to tackle a game title the place you men could really become familiar with Christina. So our icebreaker for this week is just a little game that we name “Would U-Haul.”
Christina:
Im, again, very stressed relating to this. This may you should be just how I come in to the online game. This might be my personal online game mindset, a tiny bit high key, some stressed. That’s fine. All of us are learning.
Drew:
I do believe which is fantastic. In my opinion that may cause you to more susceptible, possibly.
Christina:
Among the best emotions.
Drew:
Only a terror, simply an intense terror. So that the manner in which “Would U-Haul” works is I’m going to describe a situation. Why don’t we refer to it as Christina fan fiction. And I also’m browsing pause after each small area as want, “Okay, Christina, i am aware which you have never ever lived with someone, do not want to live with a partner. But under these scenarios, would U-Haul?”
Christina:
And that I will either state yes or we’ll say, “i am all set.”
Drew:
If you don’t â well, we’ll see right here. But I’m thrilled. In my opinion I’ve perhaps damaged the signal.
Christina:
You cracked the rule? I am excited.
Drew:
Why don’t we see how long this takes. And if you never do, I think you winnings? I don’t know how you will find champions right here.
Christina:
I am not sure that there are champions into the online game of U-Hauling.
Drew:
Well, I don’t know in the event that you’ll agree with that after this. So I’m getting heading.
Christina:
Reasonable enough.
Drew:
Okay. So, Christina.
Christina:
Drew.
Drew:
You’re at your buddy’s marriage. Inspite of the plethora of romcoms you absorbed, you did not choose this wedding ceremony considering you would fulfill anyone because, well, this isn’t a romcom. Here is the actual and regular longevity of Christina Grace Tucker. You adopt the assigned chair and therefore are glancing at the cellphone whenever you recognize a female at your dining table is wanting at you. She presents herself as the pal’s former baby sitter. She’s remained a friend from the household, but she does not actually know any person there. She appears to be mid-forties and also a striking angular face. You start chatting. She proposes to enable you to get a glass or two. As soon as she stacks up, you realize she actually is six legs high, 6â² 3â³ in heels. So that you know very well what? I am merely likely to stop there and stay want, at this point, would U-Haul?
Christina:
I am captivated. I am captivated because i would get laid as of this wedding. But up to now I’m not U-Hauling anywhere.
Drew:
Cool. That’s entirely reasonable. Completely fair. Okay. Which means you spend the entire wedding learning each other. Absolutely only a sudden spark and quick chemistry. And certainly, you do hook up together with intercourse is actually incredible.
Christina:
Tight.
Drew:
And therefore this wedding was in Northern California. And so you both increase your own remains for a few days to bang and check out and consume at restaurants and fuck. And also you provide to separate the expense of the today mutual area, but she laughs you off and is also like, “certainly maybe not, honey.” So the subsequent 3 days are secret. You are feeling your own wall space tumbling straight down. You are dropping faster than you ever before have actually. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
So simply for understanding’s sake, i am having a difficult time picturing a world for which we got three surprise times off work to go out with individuals I do perhaps not know. That looks bonkers. But if used to do, best for myself. But i am simply not U-Hauling during this period. It will be a no.
Drew:
Great. Okay. Which is fine. You only came across. I get it. I have it. Okay.
Christina:
Thank you so much such.
Drew:
So she comes back to New York and you also come back to Philadelphia.
Christina:
That’s where I stay.
Drew:
And you’re texting everyday. That’s where you live and it is where this woman lives. And you are texting on a regular basis while see each other many times 30 days. She’s really hectic together work, but she’s rapid to purchase you a train solution to arrive see this lady and remain at her stunning brownstone in Fort Greene. Immediately after which six months pass. Plus one night if you are over to supper, she requires that relocate along with her. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
And proceed to Nyc? I really don’t really love nyc. No, I am not moving in at 6 months tag. I’m not undertaking that, no.
Drew:
Okay, okay. Completely, totally, entirely. Wow. Okay. So that you hold dating long-distance. She realizes that you need some time and she’s ready to await you. A few more months move. Its now been over a-year. Your own property manager informs you that they’re selling your place to a developer that is installing apartments, so that you can’t restore it. You will need to find a fresh place. Your own today sweetheart lets you know that no stress, but her provide however stands. Would U-Haul?
Christina:
Okay. At this point, I would U-Haul for a few reasons.
Drew:
Yay! Fine. Kindly reveal.
Christina:
Largely, in a global where my personal landlord offered the house to develop it, my property manager is now my companion, to ensure that appears like some thing moved wrong within our friendship. And that I might choose to merely leave Philadelphia anyway. Of course, if I get to maneuver in using my girl over here, that seems good. That is fine. Entirely okay. But yeah, i do believe i would need an external power like a mean property manager.
Drew:
That’s so â ok. I did so believe you’d should need housing to obtain there, therefore I’m glad We understood that.
Christina:
Yeah. That is just what must affect myself very first.
Drew:
Well, I’m grateful to know what it takes. Therefore theoretically, if perhaps you weren’t kicked out, simply how much additional time?
Christina:
Frankly, that could went on for some time. Philly and New York aren’t even that not each other. I obtained area over here. We are moving forward and backward. We’re having fun. I could have permit that roll for some time until I guess Shoshana turns into the worst person I’m sure.
Drew:
I did not realize Shoshana possessed home. Well, there you decide to go.
Christina:
There we get. Wow, that was exciting.
Drew:
Well, thank you for playing.
Christina:
I am stressed, to be clear.
Drew:
And I’m grateful that I’m sure⦠Maybe if you are ever before, therefore if anybody’s ever dating you and wishes one to relocate, perhaps the gf informed Shoshana to market the home with regard to your own commitment.
Christina:
Truthfully the quickest way â someone would just have to speak to Shoshana and start to become similar, “simply kick this lady completely.” Immediately after which she’d end up like, “Yeah, sure. Naturally.” That could be the way it took place, though she didn’t promote the house. Somebody would just be like, “is it possible to simply stop her out therefore she’s going to merely overcome it and move around in beside me?” And she would state yes. One hundred percent she would do this. That’s what relationship is actually.
Drew:
I really like that.
Christina:
Yeah, that’s really gorgeous.
Drew:
Well, i’m like we discovered alot about you.
Christina:
Thanks. I feel like We learned a whole lot about my self, too. Danger of homelessness is really the point that keeps me transferring any situation, I guess. Wow.
Drew:
Well, that is fantastic.
Christina:
Which was actually thrilling. I am similarly happy to go into all of our primary segment because i do believe making reference to lesbian connection with this particular visitor, with this particular unique visitor, In my opinion it will likely be incredible, Drew. Just how are you currently feeling?
Drew:
I’m very thrilled. This will be a specialist. By that, I mean an
L Keyword
specialist, additionally a little bit of a specialist within the topic in front of you.
Christina:
I believe two things is generally true, my buddy. I think a couple of things could be correct indeed. Can we would you like to present all of our visitor or do we wish our guest to introduce themselves?
Drew:
I might love our very own guest introducing by herself.
Christina:
Guest.
Drew:
I will claim that the guest could be the one and only Riese Bernard.
Christina:
Guest, communicate.
Riese:
Hi, I’m Riese. And it is unusual as the visitor!
Christina:
Yeah, really.
Riese:
I got to not say something. I didn’t actually take action. Used to do state circumstances. I experienced to sit down here calmly.
Christina:
And you were really fearless. As well as your confronts were appreciated.
Riese:
Many thanks such.
Christina:
Though this is certainly clearly an audio average, I want all of our audience to know that Riese was creating some great impulse faces during “Would U-Haul.”
Riese:
Absolutely different ways become heard. Do you know what What i’m saying is? That’s what i state. I’m the Chief Executive Officer of Autostraddle.com. And I also’m additionally on an undefeated kickball team. That is certainly myself. We have a dog called Carol. And that I have actually dated men and women.
Christina:
Congrats from the kickball!
Riese:
Thanks a lot. I have been associated with individuals.
Christina:
Great. Enjoying that. That is fantastic to carry to this, this here dating podcast. That is excellent.
Riese:
Yeah. I believe that⦠can there be other things?
Drew:
No, i do believe that is great, Riese.
Christina:
Anything you wish discuss.
Riese:
I enjoy raspberries, the fruit raspberries, and private pools.
Christina:
Compared toâ¦
Riese:
You Realize when someone goes likeâ¦
Drew:
It is like once you strike. Yeah.
Christina:
Oh. Those tend to be gross, so I just evacuated them from my head.
Riese:
Yeah. That is certainly all.
Christina:
Great.
Drew:
Well, we right away considered you for this topic.
Christina:
That is correct.
Drew:
Because first, obviously, queer ladies and non-binary people in lesbian neighborhood are like, I am not sure, sex with others who people they know have obtained sex with since well before
The L Term
was ever a series. But I do feel
The L Term
solidified a specific cultural thought of the chart with Alice Pieszecki. And so I felt like might have a lot of understanding of this topic.
Riese:
Its true. Two of the experts, i wish to state, of
The L Keyword
had this actual data ones as well as their buddies they certainly were attracting regarding the wall structure or whatever. And Guinevere Turner, i believe, was actually one among them. She talked to us about it, that they had developed this. Because certainly, everybody because journalist’s area had banged other individuals for the publisher â you understand, and the extensive internet of these generation of lesbians in l . a .. And in addition they saw that and they certainly were like, “let us put it in tv series.” And a few of those are on the information. Like, some people whom ⦠like, actual men and women are throughout the chart as a tale.
Christina:
That is incredible. That is the way you know you have made it.
Riese:
Isn’t really that sweet?
Christina:
That could be thrilling for my situation.
Riese:
So when you yourself haven’t observed
The L Term,
to begin with, congrats. Second, it will become the centerpiece of a single of our direct character, Alice’s, apartment. She’s got every thing over her wall surface. Looked after will be the name of an online site they started labeled as ourchart.com that flopped. As well as the concept ⦠And it’s during the pilot, i believe. When you look at the first episode, Alice starts writing on how everybody’s linked, because everyone’s hooked up with this person. And that I can hook up you, as if you’re probably at the most two levels far from myself. Hence was true. Like, despite having Dana, who’d limited knowledge because she had been a closeted football player, they still managed to hook up their. That is certainly actual life because it’s correct.
Christina:
Which is tradition. Yeah. That’s what tradition seems like.
Riese:
Which is tradition. That is queer tradition immediately. And from now on everyone else makes their maps.
Christina:
Yeah. To ensure would be my subsequent concern, ended up being have actually either of you made a chart? Because Really don’t believe i’ve, I am also sorts of now considering like, that which was this this past year sitting within my home for basically did not make a chart? Like, that which was the point of that, really?
Riese:
I do believe I’ve done it inside my journal, in the same manner like ⦠Because I like, I am not sure, arranging info, I guess, as an idea workout.
Christina:
Yeah, I think which is in addition why i’m surprised that You will findn’t completed it. I prefer the concept of categorizing situations.
Riese:
Appropriate. Yeah. Since it is fascinating. I am not sure why it’s very interesting, but it’s. It’s fascinating to be similar, wow, many of these men and women, they can be connected. It’s untamed.
Drew:
About tv show, once ourchart.com is actually conceived, they’ve got an authentic data that individuals can add on things. And that I feel like something that you joked pertaining to on
To L and Right Back,
and from now on folks say on a regular basis is similar to, when this existed in a real means, not one person would put their particular brands about it, not one person would feel comfortable getting their names upon it.
Riese:
Might.
Drew:
I would personally. I would personally end up being really fine along with it existing. I’d never ever add some other person without their particular authorization. Nevertheless concept of similar, whenever some body ended up being like, “make sure you happen to be attached to me,” I would end up like, “Yeah, it is the existence I resided. I don’t mind.” Is odd? Is the fact that a challenge?
Christina:
No, since if I found myselfn’t, I would feel bad not ⦠I would end up like, “Wait, I’m not about it? Like, I’m sorry, just what?” No, that would actually send me personally into a light ethical stress about whom i’m as you, the things I’m undertaking. Am we interesting? Carry out individuals {like